Real talk; I hate cleaning. I hate it. I hate it. I HATE it. (I hate it so much that I’m dreading writing this blog post, so it might suck.) My house is disgusting and I’m living in squalor right now. It’s straight up Roman Hovel in here. It’s gross. We might have chipmunks.
I would insert a picture here but wordpress is being an ass.
Any who! I’ve recently decided that I can no longer live in the squalor that I’ve grown accustomed to, so I had to figure out a way to get me to want to actually clean my house. I can’t just get up and tell myself that’s it’s cleaning time, I have to have something to motivate me. Another problem is that I don’t even know where to start! There is so much shit that needs to be done and I don’t even know what it is that needs to be done! It’s a disaster!! So I googled what chores needed to be done weekly and made a list of those tasks, and then I divided those tasks up for different days of the week! So here is my cleaning schedule!!
- Open windows
- Sweep and mop floors
- Vacuum floors
- Sweep floors
- Clean stove top
- Scrub and disinfect sink
- Wipe down and clean counter
- Sweep floors
- Clean lint filter (washing machine)
- Wash clothes
- Sweep floors
- Clean bathroom mirror
- Clean shower and bath
- Clean toilet and basin
- Clean sinks
- Replace hand towels
- Sweep floors
- Change the sheets
- Make sure clothes are put away
- Shake quilts and blankets
- Sweep floors
- Dust TV and electronics
- Plump cushions
- Remove newspapers, magazines, and mail
- Sweep floors
- Grocery Shop
- Put away out of place things
And that’s my cleaning schedule! It’s pretty easy and I feel like I get the work done when I can check it off of a list. Yay/fuck cleaning!
Uh. Uh. What? Read those last three sentences with a rap beat behind them; it’ll make more sense. HELLO WORLD! Once again, I am here writing to myself! Yay!!! God love me, I’m so narcissistic. Where were we? Right. Workouts. Okay. Real talk. I used to be really in shape. Like really in shape. Like really in shape. I used to be on the track team and run the 400 m and dance a billion times a week and I ate well and life was awesome and I was 15. But now I’m 18 and I’m a lazy fat ass. Which is sad because I’m young so I should run while I still have legs and a good heart and I can be a lazy fat ass when I’m DEAD.
So here’s what I’ve been doing recently to kind of get in shape without taking my lazy ass to the gym. First, I went on Pinterest and searched fitness. Then I saved a bunch of picture workouts and inspirational pictures and quotes and shit to my computer. Now, every morning, I wake up and I scroll through the pictures and quotes to get pump up, listen to some awful but fun workout music, then I just choose three workouts and do them. And it’s great. Here are the three workouts I’ve been doing recently!
So yeah! That’s what I do! These will make you surprisingly sore afterwards. Also, I thinks that these are geared more towards women, but I don’t see why a guy couldn’t do these . I mean, what guy wouldn’t want a “Mali-booty”? Also, full disclosure, I’m super happy with my body. I fucking love it. I think she’s great. Here names Vivianne. We get along really well. I’m working her out because I love her and I want her to stay healthy 🙂
Woot! Work out. Yeah.
Oh, the second photo is from toneitup.com !
Our hearts, thoughts, and prayers go out to the victims, victims families, and those affected by the Aurora Movie Theater Massacre. Innocent people should never have to face that sort of fate, be it death or the tragedy they will bear on their chest for the rest of their lives. They were just hundreds of people eagerly awaiting the newest movie of their favorite super hero franchise like we all were. It was just by the grace of god that that wasn’t my movie theater. And I sat there, forcing popcorn and pizza into my over fed face, while those innocent people were forced to the ground, fleeing fire. They will never forget what happened to them on that early summer morning, July 20th, 2012. And I can’t help but to feel guilty because I’ll read the news reports, feel terrible about it, write about, pray for them tonight, but tomorrow morning I’ll wake up and watch TV and my mom will turn on the music and in a few weeks it won’t be on our mind any more. We will move on from something that some people will never, ever be able to forget. There will not be one day where the people of Aurora won’t think about what happened early this morning. The news reports will slowly fade away and the presidential campaign will begin again and that will be that. And I’m not saying that that’s wrong or that there was anything anybody could have done to prevent what happened, but it’s sad that in a few weeks people will insist on having less regulation on firearms and that we need to focus on abortion and gay rights and blah blah blah. It just seems weird to me that we care so much about things that seem so trivial. We put so much energy into our jobs and the internet and reading and TV and escaping each other instead of reaching out and thinking about how something affects someone else.
And I feel bad and selfish for feeling bad about this. It didn’t happen to me, I shouldn’t be so effected. I guess, I just…I just realize that this could happen to any of us at any time and that I feel bad that it happened to those people. So reach out to others. See how they react to things. Lend out a hand. I don’t even know what I’m writing, I just feel awful and I don’t fully understand why. I should volunteer more. Maybe if more people volunteered the world would be a better place. Maybe we just don’t have enough time for other people.
Yesterday was my birthday!! Which means that I’m 18! Woot woot. This also means that I couldn’t get my shit together to write-up a post yesterday. So I apologize. But who reads this? Me. So whatever. Any who! The other day I found a great recipe (thanks to Tone It Up) that I thought I would share with you! It’s a quinoa edamame salad and it looks delicious. Now, I realize that some people don’t eat quinoa because of issues with Bolivian trade (see here), but I feel like you could easily replace quinoa with Israeli Couscous. So here’s the recipe!
See original post here!
Welcome to my first installment of the great new series What to Wear Wednesday! It’s about fashion and shtuff. Fancy I know. Oh my god, guys! This is my first real post about something in my life! Weepy moment. Damn it! I told myself I wasn’t going to cry.
Real talk, I didn’t plan anything for this post. Starting out strong, I know! But, luckily, I did go shopping today so I can show you what I purchased. So that’s good. I should be posting about how to wear clothes that I already own because I get a new article of clothing, like, once a week because I have a problem and this blog is supposed to be about how I’m getting my life in shape. Whatever, at least they were dirt cheap.
All right. The deal with the deal. I’m currently in a town infested with the Art Fair, which kind of sucks but everyone from out of town loves it. The good thing about this art fair (is not actually the art. The art is crafty and terrible.) is the magnificent sales. One such sale is the Urban Outfitters sale, where all of the clearance items are 50% off! It’s actually the tits. So here are some of the wonderful little items that I purchased from this wonderful, big sale.
Picture time! Sorry for their quality. Or lack there of. Also, keep in mind that these are clearance clothes!
Back View of the Pineapple Sweater
Big Splurge @ $10.00!
Bonus! T.J Maxx find for $9.99
And the back!
That’s all folks!
Imma be real. This blog is mostly for me. How you stumbled upon this page I will never know. But I’m glad you did! Come on in! Make yourself feel at home. You don’t have to take your shoes off…oh no, you can if you want to I’m just saying that you don’t have to. Well…do you want something to drink? No? Okay. Anyway, like I was saying, this is kind of my personal way of keeping myself on track. I want to make sure that I go to college armed with knowledge of how to take care of myself. I also don’t want to be so gross. Like, I identify with foul bachelor frog way more than is healthy.
This is me. On a good day.
Right. So basically I’m taking the idea that I need to shape up aspects of my life represented by different body parts. Oh my god, that sounds so Ann Arbor, MI. But hear me out! Like, my head represents mental health; my face represents beauty; my chest represents fashion (Because… I don’t know. Fuck you, that’s why.); my stomach represents diet; my hands represent hygiene (yes, I am having a category for this); My legs represent exercise and general health; and my feet represent home and household cleanliness. I’ll probably have random posts about my life and things that I like and whatever, because once again this is my blog and while I’m glad you’re here you are a guest. Are you sure you don’t want anything? I can make you a sandwich? No, sorry, we don’t have Nutella. Well I don’t buy groceries for you, I buy them for me. Shut up fat-ass! Sorry, I took that too far. Also, fuck academic writing style, I write how I want. A lot of punctuation. And short sentences. That are disjointed. And random long ones because I don’t really know where to stop the sentence and I’m not about to go back again and edit these posts that no one is going to read except for me.
Anyway, that’s my blog and I hope you like it! But not too much. As a friend.